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Tuesday, August 9, 2016

Meh

Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love. - Neil Gaiman

Tuesday, February 2, 2016

Pep Talk

Some days, girl needs a serious pep talk. Who better to do that than myself?!
I've always been a very "convincing" person and have needed no help pumping myself up, but lately I've been really struggling in that area for some reason. Stepping foot in Europe with no idea of where I was going, not the slightest clue as to where my friends were, and not speaking a single word of the local language reminded me that I'm awesome. I resorted to (what I honestly think is my most redeeming quality) of building myself up. Though as an adult, with a lot more failures under my belt, I've noticed this skill gets harder and harder to maintain. So I came up with the most awesomely awesome pep talks girl can come up with!

For the plethora of times I'm having a shit day, I just tell myself...
Girl, you're only 25. You have a head of gorgeously thick hair and no a single wrinkle yet. Not to mention, those lips. 
My friends are all having babies and getting married! Blah blah blah, good for them. I have a bioluminescent brontosaurus. He's regenerative and faithful, also, he never talks back; but I like to imagine him with a sassy personality.
People your age are graduating college and getting big kid jobs. Awesome for them! I'm so envious of their huge piles of debt. Too bad for me, I've taken adequate time off school to both study and work to pay for school so I won't have that mound of debt! I also have years worth of travel under my belt that they can only dream of until they've paid off their debt.. 20 years from now. I don't mean to brag, but how many of my friends will be able to call themselves doctors, speak several languages, and say they have 6+ degrees when they're done with school? Eh?
Wow. These guys are always doing something fun, I am so lame. Hey, remember that one day you had off work and got bored so you went skydiving and called your mom from the plane? That was funnier than the day you made a video of yourself bungee jumping and didn't tell her until hours after the fact. You're both hilarious and awesome.

And for the mother off all bad days:
Hey, it's just one bad day. Could be worse. You could be being eaten by that barracuda you saw while scuba diving in Mexico. This is different, I just can't make it through this day. Hey, girl! You've traveled to 25 different states, most without injury or natural disasters too! You've traveled to three different continents and came home without any deathly plagues! You've been to eight countries by YOURSELF, most of which you didn't speak the language and made it through just fine! And had a damn good time. Yeah, I suppose I'm doing okay. Damn straight you're doing okay. Thomas Rhett has a song that mentions never seeing the Eiffel Tower at night or the Northern Lights, guess what? You've done both of those! So you know what, fuck this bad day. You've had so many good days, what's one bad day? Get over it. There will be more good ones, starting now.

Reality

I'm just an ordinary person with amazing expectations for my life.

Monday, January 11, 2016

36: Spend New Years Eve in...

New Years Eve 2016 went a little differently than my usual NYE shenanigans: there was no heavy drinking, partying until sunrise, crawling into a tiny diner at 6 am for breakfast, but I'm not complaining. This year, I got the amazing opportunity to roll into 2016 on Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom roller coaster with two of my best friends.. At Disney Paris! We all spent the day exploring Paris and then spent the night riding roller coasters and watching fireworks through a silhouette of the Hollywood Tower of Terror. It was perfect ☺️